One of the biggest problems people have today is wrapping their heads around the fact that they could possibly do something so bad, so terrible, or evil that God would punish them by sending them to hell for eternity. In the very back of their minds, if not at the front, I suspect most people at some point in their life ask, “would God really send ME to hell?”
And then immediately, our minds start to go into overdrive in order to convince ourselves that “I am a good person,” or “I never committed genocide or committed mass murder, maybe those people deserve hell, but not me,” or “God loved sinners in the Gospel, so of course he wouldn’t cast them into hell—that’s why He died for me.”
The idea of being cast into hell on the surface may seem so unjust, so cruel, that if we are also supposed to believe that God IS love then the idea of hellfire and ETERNAL damnation seems not only disproportionate to anything we could possibly do wrong in this life but is also contrary to the idea that God IS Love.
The problem with all these sentiments is that they are NOT Christian ideas and have no basis in Scripture or Tradition or objective reality at all. It also defies common sense, if you really think about it.
The misunderstood part is that God never desires to send anyone to hell, you choose to put yourself there. If you end up in hell it is because you chose it by putting yourself or something else before God and/or your neighbor. Hell certainly is a punishment because it’s a consequence of your wrongful actions, but it is also a punishment you intentionally asked for. In a way, God is simply giving you what you want.
It is not necessary to make a formal declaration like a Satanist to tell God you reject Him. It is done by your actions. If I lie and cheat on my spouse, do I really need to say I don’t love her? No, because the actions speak for themselves. That’s what sinning is, acting in a way contrary to love of God or neighbor. So, you are making a free and voluntary choice to destroy your relationship.
Now, it is true that God is merciful but not in a legalistic way. The only way to fix your relationship with God is to confess your sins and reconcile with Him before you die, just as you would with the spouse you cheated on. This is primarily done through Catholic sacramental confession—you need to tell a priest, who stands in the place of Christ, “I am heartily sorry for doing such and such, and I promise not to do it again” and mean it! Isn’t this just common sense???
“But can’t I just tell God that personally without a priest?” But I would counter, if YOU are at fault, who are YOU to tell God how you should apologize to Him? If He asks you to confess your sins to priest, and you are the one at fault, doesn’t it make sense that you should confess to a priest? And He makes it very clear that is the ordinary way He expects you to confess your sins (see John 20:22-23).
And by the way, anyone who has gone to sacramental confession knows there is a difference between just lying in bed at night alone and telling God you are sorry, and telling a priest face to face or in a confessional booth that you are sorry. There is something about our human nature that makes an in-person confession more difficult but also more sincere, which I suspect, is one reason why God prefers sacramental confessions. Our contrition NEEDS to be sincere and personal because that is what love for God requires.
Then you may ask, “But why can’t I be contrite after I die, can’t God pluck me out of hell and put me back in Heaven?” And the answer to that is NO. Once you die, your opportunity to repent and reconcile with God is at an end. The state of your soul at death is the final one. This also may seem a bit harsh, but it’s completely fair and just.
If you repent or change your mind after you receive your judgment, your decision would be influenced by the fact you already know your sentence. If you already know your sentence, then your contrition will not be a true one or one made completely free from coercion—that’s not love. If a murderer is arrested and never says he is sorry or feels bad for two years while awaiting trial but only feels bad after his conviction and sentence, is that contrition complete and fully voluntary?
To be truly reconciled with God, to receive forgiveness from Him, you must be TRULY sorry for sin. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. This is the purpose of Lent to reflect on how badly we have treated God and then take steps to correct it.
Final objection: “wait, I thought Christ died on the Cross for us and that my sins were forgiven that way!” Only legalists think this way—and shows not only a lack of a good relationship with Christ but an attempt to abuse it.
Yes, Christ did die on the Cross for you, he paid the debt justice demands that you could not pay because of your offenses against the infinite God. However, when you sin, you are voluntarily REJECTING Christ’s gift to you personally. You are telling Him, “Thanks, but no thanks, I am happy continuing what I am doing now.” Imagine telling Him that face to face as he suffocates to death with broken bones and blood pouring to the ground, hanging on the Cross for you.
The point of all this is that we are given a limited amount of time on this earth to show God we love Him. If we screw up, then we must reconcile by confessing our sins and making a firm and honest commitment not to do it again. Do not just sit back and say “I know I made bad choices in my life, but I am a good person and God knows my heart.” WRONG. That’s not how real relationships work. There has to be a final end point when God will accept our ultimate choice, and that moment is at the time of death. Don’t wait until it is too late—death can come like a thief in the night.
Have a Blessed Lent season.